French or Foe? by Polly Platt

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Polly Platt's book French or Foe? is an indispensable guide for anyone planning to live or work in France. With case studies and plenty of humor, Ms. Platt adroitly explains why it is that other cultures have such a hard time dealing with the French. The American myth of the "rude French" is discussed in detail, and we discover that it is in fact Americans who are (unknowingly) rude to the French, and that the French are simply reacting with puzzlement or fear, which is read as arrogance or coldness.

From Gallic history to "magic words," Ms. Platt reveals the secrets to surviving in French society. She points out that in contrast with Americans who smile at virtually everyone they meet, the French only smile when they have reason to: a shared dilemma, a close encounter, a special relationship. Their lack of facial expression is by no means an indication of dislike for the person to whom they are speaking, yet the differences in American and French cultures lead to such erroneous conclusions, which is one of the causes of friction.

Polly Platt managed Culture Crossings Ltd., which offers intercultural training and consulting firm for transferred executives and their spouses. She lived in France for 25 years.