Obesity is a big problem in France, and it keeps getting bigger. In September 2008, Valérie Boyer, UMP deputy of Bouches-du-Rhône, published a report announcing that 50% of French adults are overweight, and 1 in 6 are obese. She proposed some 80 measures to help trim some fat from the collective French waistline.*
Not to be outdone, French president Nicolas Sarkozy today announced Nouvelle cuisaine, a package of delicious incentives and tax breaks to encourage the French to eat better even while struggling financially. Nouvelle cuisaine (the second word is coined from cuisine - food/cooking + saine - healthy) emphasizes fresh fruit and vegetables, whole grains, and lean fish, while eschewing red meat and dairy products.
Under the Nouvelle cuisaine ruling, consumers have a financial stake in eating better. Here are some of the highlights:
Note: The first paragraph is true and the source article is real, but I made up all the Nouvelle cuisaine nonsense. Not a bad word play, eh?
Previous April Fool's:
+ La Simplification de la langue française
+ Fight for Standard French: French-Canadians petition for recognition of their language
+ France Fights Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast
*Le Figaro : La France à la traîne dans la prise en charge de l'obésité
Not to be outdone, French president Nicolas Sarkozy today announced Nouvelle cuisaine, a package of delicious incentives and tax breaks to encourage the French to eat better even while struggling financially. Nouvelle cuisaine (the second word is coined from cuisine - food/cooking + saine - healthy) emphasizes fresh fruit and vegetables, whole grains, and lean fish, while eschewing red meat and dairy products.
Under the Nouvelle cuisaine ruling, consumers have a financial stake in eating better. Here are some of the highlights:
- 10% discount off any grocery bill which includes no beef or cheese
- All fat-free yogurt is now VAT-free
- Buy two zucchini, get one free at any marché in France (Saturdays only)
- Pêchez votre perche (Catch your own perch) parties in select locations
"Zis is a travesty! Red meat and crème fraîche are ze foundation of French cuisine. Zis 'cuisaine' is ridicule! Meat is good, meat is 'ealthy! Besides, 'ow can a chef make ze bœuf bourguignon wizout ze bœuf? I suppose we will just drink ze burgundy? And crème brûlée sans crème is nossing. We should brûler every memo about zis nonsense. Alzough I would quite like to allow smoking in my restaurants."The Nouvelle cuisaine proposal is expected to swim through French parliament, and the first Pêchez votre perche party will take place in one year, on April Fool's! Poisson d'avril ! Did I get you? Ha ha, see you next year!
Note: The first paragraph is true and the source article is real, but I made up all the Nouvelle cuisaine nonsense. Not a bad word play, eh?
Previous April Fool's:
+ La Simplification de la langue française
+ Fight for Standard French: French-Canadians petition for recognition of their language
+ France Fights Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast
*Le Figaro : La France à la traîne dans la prise en charge de l'obésité
Comments
Bon,
You got me. I have been in France too long. Sharko is capable of this….still waiting for no ads on TV….or was that you too?
A+
You got me…………….excellent…………happy April fool’s day
I admit I fell for that. I was thinking, “What the hell…” about the irony of lifting the smoking ban for meat-free restaurants.
Loved it! But my French teacher said that April Fools are made in the afternoon in France, whereas in England they should only be made before midday? Come on, what is the important ruling on this….
Wow! That was a good one, especially the franglais bits
OK. You got me Laura! Although I have to say I was skeptical about that “smoking ban” lift….. but I wasn’t skeptical about the fact that Sarkozy would give much attention to such a matter as reducing obesity.
It was fun!
Hook, line and sinker!
There again you’ve been kidnapping bosses over there lately and Sarko might storm out of the G20 summit today so I’d believe anything about that wonderful country that I can’t wait to get back to!
Ah! I was about to write it into my note book and discuss it today with my language exchange person!
Cherie, that was smart. you got me easily.Thanks for the joke. All works without play they say makes jack a dull boy.
Merci beausoup.
Nice one!
How would you say “you got me” or “I fell for it” in French?
I was going to say that I thought it was a pity that you gave it all away in the final paragraph but then I read the other comments … and now think that it’s just as well that you did! It will soon be time for the Swiss spaghetti harvest …
http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/hoax/Hoaxipedia/Swiss_Spaghetti_Harvest/
I remember watching that one as a kid – it got my mum, after all it was the BBC and it was Richard Dimbleby.
Gosh… I completely fell for this! haha, I should have suspected something was amiss, especially when you quoted M ‘Amant Dechasse’ (a nice word play there as well) as having said “Zis is a travesty!”
Clearly you had a lot of fun writing this… “Buy two zucchini, get one free at any marché in France (Saturdays only)” mdr…
Merci pour avoir ecrit cet article; vous me faites sourire!
Excellent. Especially the Chef’s part. That was very funny.
Happy April Fool’s Day!
Glad you all liked it! It was a lot of fun to write.
Felicity – I don’t know, I’ve never heard there was a time limit.
John – Tu m’as eu !, Je me suis vraiment laissé prendre !, Je me suis vraiment fait avoir !
Btw, for anyone who didn’t know, April Fool = poisson d’avril because the French custom is to stick a paper fish on your friend’s back without him/her noticing.
Laura K. Lawless
Learn French at About
Tu m’as eu!
Mais il y a un tas d’os dans la perche.
Je pensais que tu allais me dire que Sarko a demissione. Il fait des siennes a Londres.
this was awesome! I fell for it big time.
Ciao, Pino
Timing is everything! If you do an April Fools trick out of time it makes you the fool! Or that’s how I was brought up???
Excellent! very funny indeed
Formidable! Tu m’as eu! J’aime beaucoup en particulier “fat-free VAT-free”! Bon Poisson d’Avril Laura, je te remercie bien pour entamer mon jour de travail avec une bonne blague!
You had me going. Great column.
I’m so gullible. It’s frightening.
Lifting the smoking ban? Priceless. I was totally époustouflée when you wrote that restaurants had incentives to eliminate the heavy cream from desserts. Ha! We all know a French chef would commit hara kiri first. Merci pour le poisson d’avril. Oh là là. Même après mon café ce matin, j’ai tout gobé.
Fabulous! You had me until I read about Amant Dechasse–it was just TOO convenient that he enjoys the hunt. Happy April fools!
That’s pretty good. Totally not expecting you to do an April Fools prank. Funny, because my wife just called me and I cut her off before she even started talking and told her not to even try an April Fools prank on me. ( I already pranked her
) I’m really ashamed I that didn’t even get suspicious while reading that ridiculous last paragraph. Zis is a Travesty indeed!
Bien fait! Tres drole. Meme en France ils ont tant de courgettes qu’ils les donnes gratuit. (mais seulement les Samedis — ha ha!)
I have to admit that I was taken in. Perhaps I’m slow, but my first indication was the “french accent” chef commentary! Pretty funny!
Merci bien.
Oh,tu m’a eu! Bonne blague!
hahaha, you almost got me laura. i fell for one earlier this day and i am totally alert since then. but it is really good.
Bonjour Laura,
Quelle histoire! c’est bien remarquable…
Je vous remercie bien pour la bonne blague d’aujourd’hui.
Bon Poisson d’Avril.
WhenI saw the word [cuisaine], instantly I thought something isn’t right. Your April Fool’s day was terrific!!!
Actually thought a beaurocrat would do the cancel red meet but allow smoking rule and not see the disconnect
Vous m’avez eu, propre et en ordre.
J’ai oublie la date-poisson d’Avril!
Marg
Fantastically funny! Today has been full of these and I get such a kick out of being fooled! Merci!
Very good, Laura – you had me too up until the quote “Zis is a travesty…” then I immediately knew it was April Fool’s. Tu n’est pas seulement un bon prof, tu est une bonne farceuse!
Wow,
Jusqu’ aujourd’ hui, j’ ai realise que c’etait deja Avril! I totally fell for it. I was like “French people, problem with obesity?! What is the world coming to? Ok, you have jokes Laura. Thanks for the good humor
I believe anything! And, here in Australia, it’s not even April Fools day anymore!
Marg
You got me! But, too was thinking that the smoking ban lift was a bit odd and I thought, “why wouldn’t everyone just buy their meat separately?”. But I was still fooled. When I read teh “Zis is a travesty”, I figured that was just an entertaining way to sum up what many chefs were thinking. LOL… that was good, though!
Tres bien Laura, mais… when I read “…grocery bill with no cheese…” I thought “Non way!”
Merci, anyway. I knew il avait quelquechose que cloche when the chef was quoted, but in a strange way it puts things in perspective.
Tu m´as eu ! Je me suis laisser porter par la nouvelle… Et tout en lisant les nouvelles bouche bée je me demandais pourquoi tu les avais escrites en ´angrench´ ou serias-t-il franglais ? Chapeau !
Excellent! As I was just beginning to acquire knowledge about the French culture, I thought I forgot to read something important. Very funny.
Laura, You got me. I thought you were going to write about the Rosé story. I saw this strange story on the French news the other night about how the Ministry of Agriculture proposes allowing French vitner’s “to make” Rosé, by blending together red and white wines. As you know, the standards for wine are very rigorous and that one can only label the wine according to the precise region were the grapes were grown. As you can imagine, the viticulturists interviewed for the story were furious. They were incensed that the politicians think they can just change hundreds of years of standards and practices in the wine industry. The folks from Provence, who must to protect the credibility and value of their very limited productions, went completely insane when they heard the proposal. You can just hear them speaking without even having seen the interview…. “just because it is THAT color doesn’t mean it is THAT wine.” In fact, I notice that the entire debate in France around OGM and food production has become a little discouraging, as if they are prepared to eliminate many of the standards that gurantee the highest quality food. Dommage. I remember the first meal that I ate when I moved to France — chicken and carrots. A very weird experience. I had a flashback — ah yes, this is the taste — this is how chicken and carrots used to taste (in the US) when I was a little kid.
Really! i was annoyed about how the situations being put into force during meltdown. finally i realised and relaxed!!..
I often go to Paris and haven’t noticed many overweight people. I even started eating like my French friend, a lot, and deliciously, and haven’t got fat, yet. Jashasyn Fransija!